excuse my spelling, im in kind of a hurry to get this done. ive been drinking tea now a days, its easier to make than coffee. anyways, i got myself a new life - a worse one - and changes have occured. this isnt a deviation you see. i dont care about deviantart, or anything related to its users, and that includes myself - as a user, that is -. art should be made when we are able to appreciate the \"artistic\" elements in such demonstrations of ... (whatever) will... if you will, in our lives. and digital art, and poetry, and ..cursors, and desktops, and themes and pictures.. simply arent making my life easier or beutiful in any way. my room
I'll tell myself, I would never tell you. I like you, I really do; but, I've told you that. Many times. And in a moment of compassion, you told me you liked me too. I don't know. I think you don't. Why should you? If its only me, I am the one who you talk to when the rest make you bored. You've told me I haunted your thoughts for some time. But it can't be true. You roam in my mind, hidden, so I cant pull you out, so don't tell me I haunted your thoughts... you don't know what haunting is; This is what I can't say; Fuck It, your words, your friends who are clearly better, much better, than me. Fuck your trust in me, fuck my trust in you. I do
As needles slowly make their way through my head I start thinking about all the things I've said, all the senseless, monotonous, sly monologues. I wish; three words misspelled, could come back to take what is mine. All these doors, all these doors. Shutting down on empty rooms of thought. And its still OK, still great, still sickening in every way. I was no more, I where no more, I be no more, I will no more; Stand up, next to the back of my head. Could never find; let you out. Find comfort in your presence, as a child at birth. Hold me down, and all the things I am to do. I promise it will be over, sooner than; Buildings close as fearful ant
I\'ve nothing to say anymore, nothing exiting, nothing new. I can\'t think, I can\'t think something is worth, a time, an effort, nothing to say, think, see, discuss, comment, disapprove, approve, examine, analyze, separate, unite, contradict, explore, discover; what is there to think? advantages? many, none, some? to do, for what? nothing. ultimately lime lost, character wasted. thought is an abstraction of the mind; no, body. thought is an abstraction of the brain, yes. made to think. made for thought. life and thought act in similar ways. not quite, not totally, not always. no logos. no thought.1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,
I have been loosing the ability to communicate, I can't even spell correctly. I remember I once used to speak coherently, but that was some time ago. some years ago. I must remind myself to stop daydreaming. or simply to stop dreaming. I dream to much. I live, have to, in a place which doesn't exist. and why? because I cant handle reality. its not good enough, the past is not good enough, and dreams, they live in the future, therefore I live in an inexistent and improbable future. and the worst thing is that I mix reality with fantasy with thoughts with desires with instincts and nothing comes out as they would want it to come out. they? yes,
we feel your temper
we know when you are scared
we like to make fun of you
we no one else is there
never lonely
count on us
we will bring you down
when you think the sky is your limit
we like to know all you know
we like to know all you know
we like to know all you know
come on, come again
count on us
we'll be friends
once again
are you scared?
no reason to be
are you scared?
no reason to be
share all you know
i'm the mood to laugh
we'll be great friends
count on us
---
(cannibals live between us, they eat me everyday)
(come one, meet my friends, laughing zombies)
a big women carrying her child,
yesterday near my house,
came close to me and said,
things,
i glanced and stared,
she continued speaking,
i guess i gave no answer,
to what apparently was a question,
i left while pointing to the north.
she grinned and waved,
i gave an answer after all.
---
someone i believe i know,
though, i don't know why,
today in the morning,
began articulating and pronouncing,
things,
and suddenly i realized.
---
i've been forgetting how to understand speech
---
it happens to me often,
i'll remember tomorrow.
fear, waiting to come out
it's in the corner
it's in the dark
dark shadows roaming to and fro
leave me, leave me all alone
...
strange sounds that i cant see (where they come from)
strange knocks, strange moans, all strange to me
leave me, leave me all alone
...
you don't scare me
just keep me alert
haven't slept all night
its turning to day
run, hide, the sun is not willing to hide
leave me, leave me all alone
...
fear, ready to display
your armament of terror, laughter and pain
leave me, leave me all alone
(you don't scare me, am i strong? celebrate me)
hit my head against the crowd
cursed infamy, cursed out loud
now creeping on the floor
my past locked behind that door
...
i remember i used to think
life was glorious, a place so unique
but now creeping on the floor
now creeping on the floor
amongst the dirt - amongst with irk
...
hit my head and cursed out loud
hit my head and cursed out loud
i remember being, long ago
it's in the past now
it's in the past now
send a ticket
send me back home
...
(i'm not feeling at home, places so unfamiliar, situations turned to stone)
...
it's in the past now
i'm too old, i should stop
don't cry now
i left the meal under your bed
pick the roses, pick my head
don't cry now
don't cry now
don't cry now
nobody cares, nobody is seeing anyway
they all have problems, no time to stare
and i'm hiding, no one will ever find (me)
don't cry now
don't cry now
don't cry now
left unused, rocking chair
i rocked for hours
when there was no one there
sight, no one there to find
sight, mirrors in my yard
sight, a tear next to me
sight, a dog singing \"nice dream\"
don't cry now
don't cry now
don't cry now
rivers, oceans, lakes and seas
filled with water
filled only for me
and i go swimming
"I write you.
I write you, and explain.
Confide. Confess.
I write you. And tell you.
Tell myself.
Just how crazy I've become.
I write you, and tell you. What I won't tell anyone else.
What I hide. By keeping no secrets. It can't all be true.
For advice. (For what?) Will they take away, all my things? Like the contract says?
What do I own, again? There's a Hello Kitty toaster. Pink.
Things. I own things.
Things. It's the little things that get you. Hair too long. A complexion that shows the worry.
Clothes not quite clean.
Little things, like shame, in even a look returned. Hurtful just to make eye contact. To see what I've become,
I can sympathize with people's pains, but not with their pleasures. There is something curiously boring about somebody else's happiness.
-aldous huxley (limbo)
How I Made My Millions
--
i was stronger
i was better
picked you out
now don't say a word
no don't yell out
never mind
let you out
led you back
stay on
sit down
let it fall
let it fall
let it fall
let it fall
i love your icon thom and radiohead are wonderful.
(and it might seem sort of strange i can recognize that particular pic, but my sister loved that photograph and had it as the background on the computer and whatnot for a while, so i know it.)
no quise leerlo en su totalidad. pero tu diario claramente demuestra su caracter cientifico, que debe de interesarte especialmente por tu condicion. en fin. la enfermedad ahi esta y va a seguir siendo perjudicial para un incontable numero de personas por algo de tiempo, desafortunadamente. cuidate. e intenta no hablar de tus problemas personales con tanta facilidad, no me conoces ni estoy relacionado contigo de ninguna manera. no quiero decirte que no me importa, porque podrias tomarme como alguien alejado de los problemas ajenos y peor aun, como alguien que no simpatiza ni se preocupa por los extraños, pero lo digo en el sentido de que no me incumbe. y parece ser que te aferras a tu estado para lograr crear en mi un sentimiento de cercania o falsa amistad a travez de problemas que nos conciernen a todos... en fin. no importa, ignora el comentario anterior si te parece que no tiene nada que ver con lo que llegaste a pensar, me da igual. a veces pienso de mas. y eso a ti no te imcumbe, y con esto podras darte cuenta de que no sigo al pie de la letra todo lo que digo. ja. en realidad solo queria mandarte un saludo por escribir en mi pagina, y decirte algo acerca de la diabetes y quiza desearte suerte o intentar decir algo ... agradable. ja. como resultan las cosas. ahora si, adios, e informate lo mas que puedas acerca de tu enfermedad o discapacidad o disfuncion, como quieras, ya que esa es la unica forma en la que podras ayudarte a ti mismo. -guillermo (nz)-------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ --------------------
Por favor k kieres!! nadie me dice k me agreges a tu puto dev+watch eres un pendejete aki nadamas no se porque pagas la subscripcion y aqui no se viene a joder aqui se viene a subir arte pages o no, seas un puto enfermo de lapra o de sida, diabetiko un sano vale verga aki lo que importa es tu arte y no si tienes una pute enfermedad mira tu basura aja esa la hago con paint por favor!!! c akabo!! ajaja!! mira tu hablando solo en tu pagina como no tienes a nadie que te escriba, ponte a razonar y no te pongas a hablar como si supieras todo del arte pendejin.. y lo que me pusiste de mensaje lo digo en 10 palabras, ponte a trabajar en lugar de estar pensando que escribirle a los demas, un consejo: mueve tu culo de donde estas y vete a cagar ah, pero si pujas y pujas y no puedes cagar, no te hagas pendejo y vete a trabajar ajaja
!!!